he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
