Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
