I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
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