it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
