I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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