Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
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