i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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