I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Randomize
