How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Randomize
