I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
