THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I checked into jail on foursquare
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
