I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
