New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
