Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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