one two three fourrrrnication!
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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