how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize