just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
