Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
