It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
