I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
