I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
