Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
