Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Randomize
