I need help removing her.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
