i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize