You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
