do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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