I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
bring money and cleavage
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
