even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Randomize
