i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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