If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
