Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
