he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
