somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
