Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
This couple is walking their pig around campus
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
