youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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