I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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