I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
