But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Randomize
