"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
