its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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