Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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