Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
