WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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