hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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