Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
she pinky promised me she was 18
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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