Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Randomize