So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I just found a bag of teeth...
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize