I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
