oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
